Don't blame me for grammar issues I wrote this on my phone

Is there anything more beautiful than a sunrise from a plane? A sea of light lavender blue with tops of dark pink and peaks of white. It was almost worth not sleeping just so I could be awake to see the first glimpse of sun. It was nice to see since it will probably by cloudy and cold in London when we land. Not that I mind. If I was freezing for the rest of my life I would be happy. If I never had to touch another human or feel the warmth of a heater I would be happy.

Flying in coach is similar to getting squashed into a sardine tin and then placed in a 500 degree oven. There is no escape from physical contact. Scooch to the left or right, rock forward or back there is always something to obstruct true comfort. This perpetual state of queasiness is made worse by the fact that we had to walk by the 'world coach' flyers who recline for the entire trip, don't have to touch anyone else and all have window seats. I would give my right arm for a window seat. And both my arms to be flying in first class. And it would also be nice I they supplied amaretto sours and sleep medication. All I had was a Heineken and an eye mask to send me off to a fitful 20 minute nap and then to be woken abruptly when the passenger next to me stirred and touched my arm. Ewwww gross gross gross heat! Will I ever be cold again.

I contemplated stripping in my seat but I feel that such drastic measures would result in me being thrown off the plane. Most likely without a parachute. Plan for the flight home: go naked or get upgraded to first class. Not sure which one is more likely. Or maybe they could just strap me to the top like a Christmas tree or a snowboard. It can't hurt to ask, the worst they could say is no. I discovered a fabulous new song Icarus by Bastille. Not conducive to sleeping but good to rock out to. Of course rocking out on a plane is ill-advised.

A bollywood dance would really liven things up right now. People dancing and singing up the isles. I would like that better than the boring hoards of people with their mouth hanging open. Stupid people able to sleep when I am awake. We will arrive in London at 11:25 in the morning, meaning a whole afternoon where I will be expected to act like a human being after sleeping only 20 minutes. We will see.

People are very interesting when they have their mouth hanging open.  The girl to my right has some amazing rings. One is a panther head encrusted with  black stones. It takes up half her finger. The other is a ball of clear glass with red swirls. It looks like a marble placed on top of a band. She is probably crazy though since it took her 3 hours to take off her giant puffy coat and I had stripped down to my tank top within 3 minutes.

One of our male flight attendants (is there a special name for them) has a tattoo on his arm. If he can be a flight attendant I am sure I could be since I am cheerful and awesome and love planes. Also I am pretty sure I would be fabulous at pointing out the emergency exits. I wonder if I could be a flight attendant on a British airways even though I am not British? Something to look into. I hope I get to sit next to someone I like on the way back. Ahhh, a Mumford and Sons song excellent to get me in he mood for a spot of fake British breakfast on a too hot crowded plane. "You did not think when you sent me to he breeeeaaaaakkkk!" Maybe I should try to sleep. Not going to happen.

The spit has formed webs in the corner of my neighbor's mouth. It reminds me of the entrance to a haunted house. All it is missing is fangs and some spiders. I guess that's what you get for sleeping with your mouth open. The tattooed mans name is Michael,  he seems nice.  All I can think about as we stay in a holding pattern in turbulence (70 mph winds) is the scene in died hard 2 when the BRITISH plane crashes into the Tarmac with the evil general going "we've got you. We've got you". Not comforting. Fighting air sickness. Ugghhh. Such an awful feeling. 

I couldn't sleep. I went to bed at 7:30 (19:30London time) because I was so tired and woke up at 5 this morning. Pretended to sleep for another hour and then gave up. It is amazing how many people are up and about walking the streets. A giant CLEAN truck came down the street and pulled right onto the sidewalk to unload bags of laundry.

The entry hall of our hotel is still decorated for Christmas. Lots of gold shiny fabric and giant red balls hang from the ceiling and a tree sits in the corner. I fully support any culture that lets Christmas cheer spread into the new year. There is a church right across the street from us with red doors and giant old fashioned windows. It is situated between a Royal Food and Wine and a Perrrfect Paws. Everything here makes me smile. On our block there are also two laundry mats, two pubs and a German YMCA.

I have already visited The Swan an The Mitre, both fabulous pubs. I like The Mitre best. It was filled with dark wood paneling and red leather. There was a fireplace in the corner and lots of locals. People even brought their dogs in. Jesse and I petted a cute jack russel terrier that practically jumped into her lap. I am trying my hardest to not be a gaping, giggling tourist, but everything amazes and excites me.

We are going on a double decker bus tour today and I am sure I will take about a million pictures. Breakfast was amazing. Croissants, warm baguettes, meat, cheese, hardboiled eggs, toast, cereal, fruit. Everything was delicious.